As Seen on TV crap

Okay, so everyone in my house is sick.

The husband has a sinus infection and has been home yesterday and today.

The boy child stayed home both days, too. He has a cold with a nasty cough.

The girl child stayed home today. She also has a cold, but her post nasal drip is causing her belly to be sick.

So, we're here watching a disgusting amount of tv.

Mostly watching the HUB.

And I have to say some of the commercials I have seen set me off.

I have seen one for a blanket/puppet. It looks RIDICULOUS!

Seriously?

~~~~

But the one that sets me off the most is the slipper/puppet.

Why would you let your kid play with something that their sweaty feet were just in?

My son said "But Mom, you can share them with your friends."

My response was "Oh yeah... here Friend, let me share my foot sweat with you!"

So gross.

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How about this one?

Here kids, let's grow our own infestation of ladybugs!

Yeah, not happening.

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Every time I see this one, I can't help but yell at the tv...

Why the hell would I teach my dog to pee in the house?!

Are people really that lazy? Seriously?

~~~~

There is not enough money in the world... seriously...

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I just can't come up with anything more than smh...

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I can make some pretty damn good s'mores in my MICROWAVE.

The last thing I'm doing is buying something special just to make fucking s'mores.

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This one I want!

My father-in-law and step-mother-in-law have one and it's awesome!!

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Seriously?

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Dude, you're not fooling anyone. Nice try though.

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I would NOT buy this for my kids. At all. Cookies should never be any of those colors. Not to mention that they don't look very appetizing for reasons other than the colors. Just sayin'.

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 11

Day 11- Another picture of you and your friends

I have like no pictures of me with any of my friends.

Seriously can't even remember the last time a picture was taken of just the husband and I.

So, here's another one of my bff, Kelly, and me...

This one was taken the same night as the last pic I posted, but the other was taken at Red Robin and this one at HersheyPark Stadium before the NKOTBSB show started.

It was wicked hot that night.

And I'm pretty sure it's safe to say we had an amazing time that night!

Had a run-in with Jordan Knight... Joey McIntyre pointed at her and blew her a kiss... she high fived AJ McLean.

Kelly is crazy. But I love her... and have a hard time doing anything NKOTB related without her!

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 10

Day 10- Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

When I'm happy, sad, bored or hyped, I mostly listen to NKOTB.

But I also have Party Rock Anthem (LMFAO), Good Feeling (Flo Rida), Give Me Everything (Pitbull), I Like It Like That (Hot Chelle Rae) on my playlist for times like that...

When I'm mad, IF I listen to music, it's The Nixons, The Offspring, Matchbox20, Papa Roach or Hinder.

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 9

Day 09- Something you’re proud of in the past few days

I got our taxes done...

Other than that, the past few days have been a bit rough.

Just happy to be waking up in the morning.

It's not the BACKRUB, but you'll still enjoy it.

We were watching Looney Tunes tonight and Bugs Bunny's girlfriend excitedly asked him if they could exchange organs...

I gave the husband a look while trying to hold back a giggle...

All he did was shake his head at me.

~~~~

I surprised the family with Dairy Queen tonight.

The husband asked me what kind I had...

I responded "Reese's peni... Reese's Pieces."

I had a little trouble controlling my laughter.

~~~~

I just got an answer right on Jeopardy that the husband didn't know!!

Yeah baby!!!

~~~~

My baby girl has a cold.

Her nose is so stuffed up, her mouth has been hanging open all day so she can breathe.

Her little nose is red and sore and her lips are wicked chapped.

~~~~

Report cards came home today.

I'm mostly satisfied... except the girl got one N (Needs support/Needs improvement) - and not surprisingly in Expresses Ideas Orally.

She also got three D's (Developing)- all in various areas of participation.

Everything else was S's (Successful).

As for the boy, he got all I's(independent) except in the three subcategories under Handwriting...

Those he got D's in.

And that's after he got all I's in handwriting at the end of first quarter.

Maybe my expectations are too high...

~~~~

Snots McGee is leaving her damn used tissues all over the house.

GROSS!!

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How can my children make a spotless room look like a tornado hit in the amount of time it takes for me to pee?

It's the only time they move quickly.

The rest of the time I'm pretty sure they would lose a foot race to a three-toed sloth.

~~~~

My boy child has incredible posture.

When I was a teenager and working at Burger King, one of the shift supervisors that I had a pretty good relationship with informed me that my posture was so straight even when I walked that it looked like I had a "broomstick up my ass".

He gave me a little bit of a complex. =\

~~~~

My husband is doing God knows what on his iPad and laughing...

He has to be taking pictures of himself.

=)

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The girl child is dancing and posing while she brushes her teeth in the full-length mirror on the bathroom door.

~~~~

The husband yelled at the cat "Why must you always bite me? Why?"

The girl child said "Because he's a cat and doesn't talk."

lmao

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My boobs seem to have disappeared.

~~~~

My favorite radio personality tweeted today that she was let go from the radio station today.

I'm sad.

=(

~~~~

The nights I spend on Twitter laughing to the point of tears with other girls just as obsessed with Donnie as I am, are some of the best nights all week long.

♥

~~~~

boring entry...

I had my eyes dilated at the eye doctor today and just trying to read makes me feel like an old lady!

~~~~

I just got my daughter's incredibly hard head smashed into my mouth full force.

My bottom lip started to bruise immediately. =(

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I was laying on my bed talking to the husband this afternoon and the boy child came in...

Laid his head down next to mine and said "I missed you, Momma."

After some questioning, I found out that after I said goodbye to him this morning in his classroom, he started to miss me.

I had been in and out of his classroom for the first 2 1/2 hours of his school day.

So I got some very rare (and very much missed) snuggle time with my baby boy. ♥

~~~~

It has been about 9 hours and my lip still hurts...

Part of it is numb...

And the teeth behind my lip where the girl's head hit me hurt.

~~~~

I called my mom for a quick little thing today and I think I ended up talking to her for like 2 hours.

It's ridiculous!

I don't talk to her that much when she's home... less than a mile away from my house.

But she's in Florida for 2 months... she's been gone for one month.

You'd think I haven't talked to her in that month.

smh

~~~~

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 8

Day 08- Short term goals for this month and why

Well, seeing as how this month is almost over and February is a short month...

My short term goals are:

~Get my tax refund

~Buy a new mattress so I can finally sleep again

~Continue doing what I do at the kids' school

~Get my pile of sewing projects finished

That's about all I can think of right now... I'm sure there are more things I could add... just can't think right now.

I'm giggling...

Because I just created a game of Hanging with Friends with Donnie Wahlberg!

I know I'll probably get denied but totally worth the try!!

Insanity!

My kids made up a song about how much they love me to the tune of Justin Bieber's Baby.

~~~~

My 5 yr old daughter knows where most of the states belong and knows some of the names.

But she doesn't talk at school...

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My car didn't start this morning.

I was already running late.

I had to cancel my appt...

I was in such a panic, I did what I usually do and called my mom...

I talked so fast I'm surprised she understood me.

Thankfully, she's in Florida and her car is just sitting in her garage... I just needed to get over there.

My mom is so awesome... she called one of her friends and they came over to pick me up and bring me to my parents house.

So, until I can get my car taken care of, I've got my momma's car.

It's 8 years newer than mine, so YAY for me!

~~~~

The boy child left me his bear this morning...

not sure if I was meant to "babysit" Bud (the bear) or snuggle with him...

So, I did both.

Bud was my nap buddy today. ♥

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Speaking of the boy child, he forgot to take Bud to bed with him tonight.

The feline came up on the couch to snuggle with me...

Or so I thought...

And then I looked over and saw this:

He changed position a few times...

He's so cute.

~~~~

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 7

Day 07- A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

My kids

Everything I do in my life is mostly for them.

I started working on focusing on the positive because of them... I don't want to be raising a couple of Negative Nellies.

I have apologized to those I bullied or friends that I should have treated differently at one time or another because they need to know how to treat others the way they want to be treated... and it's just hypocritical to teach it to them if I don't do it myself.

I stay home rather than work because of them... that and child care is wicked expensive.

I spend my mornings at their school volunteering my time because I want to be as involved as I can possibly be.

I feel that I'm a better person because of them.

I couldn't imagine what life would have been like had they not come along when they did.

I am so unbelievably blessed by having these two in my world.

♥

Busty?

My daughter picked out some books from her shelf and came and laid down on the couch...

I hear her reading them to herself...

I sit here thinking she's cute, until she gets to the next book...

And I hear her say:

"Busty Trains"

WTF?

I look over... the title of the book is BUSY Trains.

I am dying on the inside!! lol

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I just filed our taxes!

*HAPPY DANCE*

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Sometimes it's the unexpected hug from behind that reminds me how much I love my husband.

It's the unexpected, but not all that surprising, thrusting action that follows that reminds me why I try to avoid such situations.

~~~~

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 6

Day 06- Favorite super hero and why

Okay, so I'll admit I cheated and did a search for a superhero with the superpower I would love to have...

Turns out, he's a bad guy.

I wouldn't use my superpowers for bad... only good.

Anyway, his name is Mister Mxyzptlk.

His superpower is omnipotence - unlimited power!

Bwahahahahahahahaha!

frothy, foamy spit?

This morning after the kids got on the bus, I decided to go back to bed.

I slept for maybe a half hour... 45 minutes...

And then the phone rang.

It was the school nurse.

Telling me that they THINK my daughter threw up.

I remembered her leaving this morning without her usual "Bye Mom! I love you!"

So, I make myself look somewhat presentable without having showered and head down to the school to pick her up.

The school nurse told me that my daughter refused to talk.

No surprise there... she never talks.

So I tried talking to her.

Nothing.

Through my incessant questioning of this morning's events, we learned that my lovely daughter didn't spit out her toothpaste this morning.

She held it in her mouth for over an hour.

And then it started slowly flowing out of her mouth while she tried to hold it in...

Frothy, foamy spit all down the front of her and on her table at school.

She freaked the hell out of her teacher!

I got the full, detailed story of how the whole morning went down from her teacher after I brought her back to her class (which was just leaving for music).

I don't know what I'm going to do with this child.

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 5

Day 05- A picture of somewhere you’ve been to

My most recent trip was to Aruba.

I won the trip for 4 in the fall of 2010.

The husband and I took our kids and we had such an amazing time... and why wouldn't we with 4 days in paradise?!

The only thing we had to pay for was transportation to and from the airport and for the kids passports, since the husband and I already had ours.

What is wrong with the people in my house?

My son is taking his toy light saber and holding it to his boy parts.

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My daughter has been singing "I have cavities in my butt butt."

"I have a dog in my butt butt."

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My husband joins in "I have a squirrel in my butt."

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My mother emailed me... my dad is upset about his "mustard collection".

She said "It took him years to build up that collection."

So, when she just called me I said to her "Tell that man IT'S FOOD NOT A COLLECTION!!!"

Seriously!

You collect coins... NOT MUSTARD!

No wonder he doesn't feel well most of the time!

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Little kid drama is just as stupid and ridiculous as grown up drama.

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There's always "that" kid in school that's so annoying no one wants to be friends with them... it's just sad when even parents want nothing to do with "that" kid either.

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My cat is a kitty crack addict.

It started with the Fancy Feast appetizers.

He would only get one a day around the same time that we would eat dinner.

If we were off schedule for some reason, he'd let us know by pawing at the cabinet where we keep his canned food.

He started pawing at the cabinet earlier and earlier.

I said to the husband one day that it was like the cat is addicted to that stuff.

It's almost like he's a crack addict needing his fix.

We switched him to cheaper canned food... and he still acts the same.

I try telling him crack is whack, yo...

Doesn't matter.

Maybe it's time for an intervention.

Or maybe I need to just stop enabling him...

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I can't believe I admitted to another parent from Jack's class that I'm obsessed with NKOTB and Donnie Wahlberg.

Why do people let me talk?

Stupid shit always comes out.

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Football is on in my house....

They just said "penetration".

*giggles*

~~~~
And no sooner did I type that ↑ and Donnie Wahlberg tweeted "One word... BALLS!"

*giggles*

Balls... and penetration...

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I want a washing machine that can sort laundry, wash, dry and fold all on its own.

But I want it to wait until there's at least a medium sized load of laundry before it washes them...

And I don't want to have to do anything but go down to get the folded clothes.

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Seriously?

South Beach Diet Bars commercial...

Who looks at a chick walking down the street and says that she looks healthy?

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30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 4

Day 04- A habit that you wish you didn’t have

Hmmm... which one should I pick? lol

I have a habit of compulsively picking at zits and/or very noticeable blackheads... and the resulting scabs after...

I wish I could just leave myself alone.

But often times, I don't even notice that I'm doing it...

My thoughts for today...

It snowed.

I'm not happy.

The end.

=)

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 3

Day 03- A picture of you and your friends

Since I don't have a pic of me and all my friends, I'll post a pic of my bff and me.

I love this girl like a sister.

♥

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 2

Day 02- The meaning behind your Blog name

There's not much meaning behind it...

This blog had another name or two before I settled on this...

I went with Scattered Thoughts because every time I tried to write about something, I'd be halfway through one topic and I'd start thinking about something completely unrelated and lose track of what I was saying.

Like just now, I was thinking of how I wanted to word something to add on to that last bit and I started wondering if I still had makeup on because my eye hurts...

And now I have no clue what I was thinking of before.

I think it's time for bed! =)

My parents are disgusting

My parents are in Florida for a couple months, so I check on their house every few days...

Yesterday I went over to steal food out of their freezer.

As soon as I opened the freezer, I knew something was wrong because the smell that greeted my nose was not pleasant!

I checked things out only to find that the freezer wasn't doing it's job.

Today a friend of my parents went over and the whole fridge was room temp.

So after cleaning out the fridge, I decided to take the liberty of checking the expiration dates and throw some things out.

My parents have brought this on themselves.

There was one time my mom gave us stale cookies... another time moldy cookies...

The most memorable was the box of pistachio Jello Pudding my mom gave us with a date on it from 1987, I think.

That was given to us last year or maybe the year before.

Tonight, as I cleaned out their fridge, I decided to take pictures of anything that had an expiration date later than 2009...

Cherries

Mustard w/ horseradish

Mustard

Horseradish

Minced garlic in olive oil

Now, the thing that bothers me most about that last one is 1996 was the year I graduated from high school.

My parents moved from NH to PA in 2002.

Which means, they moved expired food from NH to PA.

Ew.

30 Days of Me Challenge - Day 1

So, I came across this on some website and decided to give it a shot.

And since today is my birthday, I figured it's the best day to start!

So here we go!

Day 1: A recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

1. I am the baby of the family by a lot.

2. I have two siblings. My brother is 8 years older than me and my sister is 10 years older than me.

3. I was born in Jersey.

4. I grew up in New Hampshire.

5. I have my bachelor's degree in Early Childhood Education/Special Education/Human Development.

6. I enter over 100 online sweepstakes every day and have won some pretty awesome things... Best one by far: A trip for 4 to Aruba including a $500 gift card to pay for meals. Transportation to and from the airport was the only thing not included.

7. I used to play the clarinet and the organ.

8. My favorite color is blue... but it you go by Crayola crayon colors Cerulean is my favorite.

9. I have a strange obsession with fabric. I could spend hours in JoAnn's Fabrics looking at fabrics and touching them.

10. I would love to make purses, cosmetic bags, tote bags and other similar items and sell them. Don't have enough $ to get started though. =(

11. Blue Bloods and Desperate Housewives are my favorite tv shows.

12. Dirty Dancing is my favorite movie.

13. I love photography. Unfortunately I don't have a very good camera, but I have taken some pretty amazing pictures with it. Sometimes I surprise myself!

14. I have one tattoo and can't wait to get more!

15. I got my nose pierced about 2 years ago when my husband challenged me by saying he didn't think I would get it done. I jumped in the car, got it done and when I came home, he couldn't believe I actually went through with it.

Entertainment

I don't get all of my entertainment from tv.

Most of it comes from my computer...

And lately, more specifically, Twitter.

First I got dragged in to a very elaborate web of lies.

It was fun at first... the occasional drama was irritating... But I didn't realize I was on the wrong side of the drama.

At least not until Sunday night when my eyes were opened to the truth.

I tried to give the benefit of the doubt...

I waited for the truth.

When I didn't see it coming, I went after it privately.

The kind of response I got made me think of "The lady doth protest too much, methinks." William Shakespeare

It wasn't until I saw the web weaver say "I wish people would come to me if they have questions." Or something along those lines...

So, I publicly went after the truth again...

Still got Little Miss Overly-Defensive.

When I got pissed enough that I had to stop because I was shaking so bad, someone else took over.

And I have to say she did a much better job than I did... and that could be because I was so close to the lies.

But watching the whole thing go down last night was very entertaining.

I have had so many people apologize for me getting caught up in the lies and hurt in the end.

While I will admit I felt hurt at first, I feel that it was a learning experience.

While I lost one "friend", I gained 20+ followers and who knows how many of those will end up being considered a friend!!

I have a feeling that some of the things that this web weaver said over the last month are going to provide me with months of entertainment!!



*Those of you who I blocked while I was tangled up in that evil web of lies, I apologize... but thank you so much for taking me back and understanding. I promise to you all that I am nothing like her... I have never said anything bad about any of you, in fact, I tried to stand up for anyone I knew even in the slightest. I will always be honest to you, unless I'm afraid of really hurting your feelings.

Love, honesty, trust and friendship are all I'm ever looking for.

can't make this shit up!

Swear to God!

And speaking of made up shit... here's a little life tip for ya...

Live your life truthfully... you never know who's watching and knows the real story.

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So, onto the good stuff...

Newspaper headlines from our newspaper this weekend... followed by my reaction when I read them...

"OMG!  I can't wait!!!  Now I can finally learn how to set up and run my own meth-lab!!"

"Wow... that's unfortunate for those girls.  I hope it didn't hurt."

~~~~

oh oh.... sometimes... I get a good feeling...

I can't tell you how much I LOVE finding an empty tube of bright pink Jolly Rancher chapstick in my dryer...

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I love that when we talked to the kids about MLK Jr. and what they learned in school about him and what he did... neither one of them noticed his skin color...

I didn't realize they didn't notice it until I asked them why some people weren't allowed to do things others were and they had trouble answering me.

My daughter said it was because they were tall.

When I asked them what was different about their skin, I was told they had more hair.

I hate pointing out to them the difference in skin color when they don't even notice it.

I want them to continue going through life not noticing the differences in people and accept people for who they are.

~~~~

What happened to Looney Tunes?

It used to be funny.

Not that it isn't even slightly funny now... but the part I just saw included Yosemite Sam's naked bum.

=\

No one needed to see that.

~~~~
Scooby, Scooby Dooooooooooo!

ugh... I'm so sick of watching Scooby Doo.

The boy child is OBSESSED!

~~~~
This chair hurts my butt.

It needs a new cushion...

Or maybe my butt needs more cushion...

hmmmm...

~~~~
Daphne on Scooby Doo has creepy purple dots for eyes.

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How does Scooby Doo pick things up?

It's not like he has opposible thumbs!!

~~~~
The husband and I have a habit of quoting lines from movies and laughing hysterically at each other.

My favorite movies to quote are Anchorman and 40 Year Old Virgin.

I thought of Meet the Parents when I said "opposible thumbs"...

"I have nipples, Focker.  Can you milk me?"

~~~~
3 days until my birthday!

I love my birthday so much it should become a holiday for everyone. lmao

~~~~
My daughter just walked by me and said "Excuse me, I tooted."

She smells like garbage.

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The 7 year old just yelled at the lamp next to the couch.

He leaned back while re-telling the book he just read for school and hit his head on the lamp.

He stood up, pointed at the lamp with his hand on the back of his head and yelled:

"That lamp is too fancy!"

"That lamp is too close to the couch!"

"That lamp is too..."

That's when our laughter stopped him and he started laughing.

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For reals, yo.

As I sit here folding the massive pile of kid's laundry, I'm watching my Twitter timeline...

And thinking...

Online you just never really know if what is being said to you is the truth...

Or if people really mean what they say...

Or if you're really talking to the person you think you are.

I, for one, am exactly the same in person as I am online.

My bff can vouch for that.

And I only say that because I know she's reading this... and my tweets... and we've known each other for 18 years.

The only time you'll get a lie from me is if I'm afraid of hurting your feelings... or if I just remember something wrong.

I don't like being lied to... and I don't like even the possibility of being lied to... so why would I ever do that to someone else?

Treat others as you want to be treated.

questions...

Ever get the feeling you've been betrayed...

But you really want more than anything to give the person the benefit of the doubt with the hopes that it really was the truth?

I hate the horrible sick feeling that betrayal gives me.

I hate trusting someone only to find there's a pretty good chance they've been lying to you all along.

I want to come right out and ask this person so many questions...

And if none of it was a lie, I want PROOF that it was the truth.

But if it turns out it was all a lie... that person will no longer have a place in my life.

Trust is too big of an issue for me.

You break my trust and you're pretty much fucked when it comes to me.

And I will make sure anyone else that was involved in this whole elaborate lie cuts you out of their life, too.

You don't get a second chance with me.

Whatchoo talkin' 'bout Willis??

My son asked for grilled cheese for lunch except he pronounced it "girl cheese"...

Ewwwwwwwwww.......

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Ugh....

I have to go change the sheets on my son's bed.

There are few chores in this house that I dislike more... And that's because he's on the top bunk.

The concept of bunk beds is great, but there really needs to be an easier way to change the sheets.

~~~~
Why do people ask me questions they know I don't know the answer to?????

~~~~
So, that chore of changing my son's sheets took a ridiculously long time.

5 hours to be precise.

Crazy, right?

Yeah.

I got sick of the fitted sheet having a broken elastic, so being Little Miss Domestic with my sewing abilities, I got this bright idea in my head to fix it.

I have given the husband permission to tell me to shut up and take any sewing supplies necessary away from me should I ever have this idea again.

It took me about an hour and a half to get the broken elastic out.

Another 3 1/2 to put a new elastic in.

Never.  Again.

My fingers are sore.

I somehow put a safety pin THROUGH my skin almost the entire width of my index finger and didn't feel it.

Didn't even know it was there until I tried to move my finger.

I keep saying I should not be allowed to use pins or needles of any kind... I always get them stuck in my skin one way or another.

smh

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Why do I almost always hear I Touch Myself by the Divinyls when I'm in the shower?

Are the radio gods trying to tell me to do something?

~~~~

Potty mouth!!!!

Okay, so it's 4 am.

I have not yet been to bed.

When I finally decided to go to bed, the husband distracted me with NKOTB on the xbox.

Being the easily amused person that I am, I was having fun telling the xbox what to do...

Until I wanted it off.

I didn't want to get up off the couch (because it's 4 am and I'm tired!), so I tried 5 different ways of telling it to shut off.

Nothing happened... So I said "xbox... Go fuck yourself."

Of course I started laughing because in my head I'm thinking "this fucker is going to respond to me and tell me to fuck off."

So while I'm laughing and telling the husband what I was thinking, I got up and out of the corner of my eye see the road in front of our house...

It looked slightly white.

WTF?!

So I looked closer.

The fucking road is covered in fucking white shit!!!!

This is just not okay with me and I let the husband know with a profanity laced mini-rant.

So, now that it's 4:30am and my kids will be up in about 2 hours... And I'm thoroughly pissed off with mother nature, I'm going to bed.

I'm wicked smaht

I set the alarm clock in the kids' room today to give them 10 minutes to finish cleaning up their room.

I never heard it go off, but I just chalked it up to one of them turning it off.

Until just now.

Son a bitch scared the living shit outta me!!

Apparently, when I set the alarm for 12:35pm, the clock was set at 12:25am.

Awesome.

because I don't want to talk to THEM...

I had two tabs open with recipes to make for dinner... And what does this smarty do? I fucking closed them both.

And I specifically remember thinking "I don't need these open anymore."

I am an idiot.

~~~~
I am so sick of counting to 3.

I'm pretty sure if I got $1 for every time I counted to three, I'd be fucking rich by now.

~~~~
You know what's ridiculous?

There are still areas around where I live that are still flooded from Tropical Storm Lee that blew through here in September.

It just rained the other day and there's a mini-pond in the cow pasture behind my house.

~~~~
I wonder what was going through the brain of the person who first took coffee beans and made coffee using them...

Or the person that first ate a banana... that I would think would have been something like "hmmm... I'm going to pick that yellow phallic thing hanging from that tree and put it in my mouth. Maybe I should see if I can peel the outside off... maybe there's something creamy and delicious inside."

~~~~
What is it with Ke$ha and glitter?

~~~~
Sometimes I wonder if my socks got mixed up with my son's...

He may only be 7, but his feet aren't much smaller than mine.

~~~~
I don't know why, but some things my bff and I used to say in high school just popped into my head.

They still make me giggle.

Like we would "fly a kite" every month... because we were "gorillas"... but we really wished we were boys...

~~~~
The husband read my earlier blog entries and reminded me that I did get a birthday present last year... it was tickets to go see NKOTBSB.

How could I forget that?!

~~~~
Sometimes you come across someone that initially you think could be a good friend...

And then after getting to know them a little, you learn you're better off keeping your distance.

And then they turn out to be absolutely fucking insane!!!

Like seriously, certifiable!

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As I listen to Pandora, while making dinner, I'm realizing that I really like Flo Rida.

Who knew?!

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The name Uma sounds weird to me.

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My son just yelled at me "I don't like the chicken with nah..."

That sent the husband off and running.

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I'm such a great mom... I just informed my son who refuses to eat chicken bathed in melted cheese and is screaming at me like he's a little girl that if he continues to scream like that I will take out his vocal cords, cook them up, cover them in cheese and make him eat them... AND HE WILL ENJOY IT!!!!!!

Yup... Mother of the year right here.

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My mouth is broken...

I was telling the husband to put something in my junk drawer, but it came out DRUNK drawer...

Yes. I have a special drawer to keep all my drunk people in.

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Do my children really hate food/eating so much that every single freaking meal has to be a fight?

And those attitudes of theirs... I promise the day I snap, it will not be pretty around here.

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The husband has football on... and I'm not mature enough to be even listening to it.

Just the word "penetration" sends me into a fit of giggles.

And "sack".

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Maybe the Cleveland Browns are called that because they're always "penetrating" each other...

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I'd like my 18 yr old body to switch places with my 33 yr old body... but I'd like my life to stay just the same.

*sigh*

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I am sooooo un-motivated...

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So, the husband just said to the girl child, who wants a piggy back ride to her bed... "are you going to get on me or what?"

smh

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S & G

I am convinced the husband has permanent PMS...

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If anyone in this house sings "Peanut Butter Jelly Time" one more time, I may just remove their ability to sing/speak altogether.

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And while I'm at it with Family Guy vids... this one makes me laugh every freaking time!!

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Kim, this video is dedicated to you...

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I can be so juvenile sometimes.  =)

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5 days until my birthday and I was told last night that I'm not getting anything again this year.

I understand why, but it makes me sad.

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Speaking of my birthday, the husband told me last night that my birthday is not a major holiday.

It SHOULD be!

I'm fucking awesome!  =)

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I'm not really full of myself... I swear.

I just say I'm awesome because... well... because I am.

Have you met me?!

Seriously... meet me and you'd agree.  lol

In all seriousness, I say it because I like me... how can I expect anyone else to like me if I don't?

Granted, there are things I need to work on, but for the most part I love the person I am.

And if you don't like me, fuck off... I don't need you in my life.  =)

So there.

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I hear my son singing Bon Jovi and it makes me giggle...

He has all the words wrong...

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I've got shit to do and I want to do NONE of it.

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The husband calls this song the Grover song...

In case you're wondering why, watch this...

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I have to go color with the girl child... I have so many other things that I HAVE to get done, but nothing more important than spending some time with my little lovebug.

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laaaaazzzzzyyyy...

For the last half hour, the husband and I have been alternating with this phrase "Okay, time for bed!"  But then neither one of us move...

The kids are still up.

They'll eventually pass out, right?

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Donnie Wahlberg will be on my tv in a half hour-ish...

Just thinking about it makes me excited like a little kid at Christmas!!

And then you know what's after that???

The Back Rub on CherryTree Radio!!

The best radio show ever... because Donnie freaking Wahlberg will be whispering all kinds of things a man other than my husband should never be saying to me... but in this case it's okay because it's Donnie.

And I have ear buds, so the hubs is none-the-wiser!!

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Okaaaayyy... NEXT TOPIC...

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Why is it that any time that husband of mine hears the word Friday, he starts singing fucking Rebecca Black and her stupid ass song?

Does he hate me?

Seriously.
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I want so badly to hunt Dog the Bounty Hunter down and cut his hair while he sleeps.

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The husband really needs to stop changing the channel on the tv from his iPad.

And speaking of tv... did he really just ask me what was on tv tonight?  Seriously?  SERIOUSLY?

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I love you, but...

God, my children can really get on my nerves sometimes.

First thing this morning, my son was pissed at me because I bought him new jeans and they're long on him.  It doesn't matter to him that once he has his sneakers on they're fine.

Nope, he just wants to give me stress first thing in the morning.

Awesome.

My daughter enjoys giving me a hard time first thing in the morning, too, except she does it by being unbelievably slow.

Some days it takes her 10 minutes just to put socks on!!

Today, she poked around so much that she barely had time to brush her hair and she got as far as putting toothpaste on her toothbrush and putting it in her mouth before the bus came.

I pushed her out the door with toothpaste still in her mouth... which I told her to just swallow.

She didn't even finish her yogurt this morning, so I'm making her eat it for lunch... it's been almost 2 hours and she still isn't done yet.

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This morning was worse than usual, I think, mostly because not only did the husband take a mental health day, but when I looked outside, there was a very thin layer of white shit on the grass and our cars.

I loathe winter.

I hate the cold and snow.

When I wake up to see snow, I curse Mother Nature.  If she was a real person, I would cause her severe physical harm... because she's an evil, heartless bitch.

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Back to the husband being home today... it doesn't bother me much... but I am a creature of habit.

When my routine gets all thrown off during the week with someone here that is usually somewhere else, my whole day feels off.

Even if that person isn't really interfering with my routine.

It doesn't make much sense, but that's how I feel.

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My best friend called me first thing this morning while on her way to work to tell me about an interview with Jordan Knight that she heard on the radio.

I love waking up to things that make me laugh.

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I love my daughter, but she really needs to stop this whole growing up thing...

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Love this...

Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can’t love and respect yourself – no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are – completely; the good and the bad – and make changes as YOU see fit – not because you think someone else wants you to be different.

Friends

I was never one of the "popular" girls in school.

I had friends... don't get me wrong... but it was a small circle.

Each best friend I have had has fallen into a certain period of time... Beth was my elementary school best friend. Tiffany was my junior high best friend.  In high school, it was Kelly and Adam.  My freshman year of college, it was just Adam... with the rest of college being just Kelly.

Kelly and I had a falling out and didn't talk for 5 years.

When we started talking again, I didn't care if we were close again or not... but somehow we're back to how we were before the falling out.. if not closer.

She's like a sister to me.  Going more than a day without talking to her makes me feel I've dropped one of my limbs.

The funny thing to me is that I have a few friends that I have made on Twitter in the last 3 months that I feel the same way about as I do about a friend I've had for 18 years.

Kelly and I gossip and have such a history that I don't have to give any background.

My Twitter sisters are silly and filter-free.

The more I get to know them, the more I love them.

And there are two girls in particular that I have learned enough about to feel like we really are sisters because we have so much in common.

I have pretty much discovered that it doesn't matter how long you've been friends with someone... what matters is the kind of friend you are.

You get what you give.

And if you don't, you should just move on... find someone who does appreciate your friendship.

And with that said... if you are one of the girls I mentioned, anything you need at anytime... you all know how to get a hold of me!  Love you!!!

Gray days

It seems lately that there are more cloudy, gray days than there are days with sun.

I am so sick of them and it's not even a month into winter... not to mention there isn't any snow on the ground... and I still have flowers blooming by the tree in my front yard.

The gray days wouldn't bother me so much right now if it was snowing because then it would at least be pretty outside... But no... it's raining... or was...

Blah...

It just makes me want to sleep...

I need to move to Aruba.